2 years ago
Admissions Advice

Peronal Statement Topic Idea


I am a rising senior who wants to know whether I have chosen a good CommonApp essay topic and which prompt the essay fits into if it is good.

I am planning to write about how I make people feel comfortable and welcome when they are new to a community or a school because I understand how it feels to be left alone.

- Usually, when someone new joins a school or organisation, people just say "hi" but do not further tend to make them feel included. On the contrary, even though I am introverted, I show them around, try to get to know them better and become a friend they can rely on whenever they have questions, feel left out or are simply uncomfortable in their new surroundings.

- I have two examples of this, and how those friends are still grateful to me even after I moved to the United States after my 9th grade in India (at the onset of the COVID-19 pandemic).

- After I moved to the United States, I realised that there is no one like me to make me feel like one with the new system (no one to do what I did for newcomers). Then the pandemic lockdown happened, and I could not make new friends till my junior year 1.5 years later due to online learning for all of my sophomore year. During this lonely time, I realised I never wanted anyone to be in my shoes and deepened my empathy for people who may feel awkward in new surroundings.

- When school finally reopened for junior year, I used that time to get to know people and my surroundings better. I was a junior with a freshman's level of experience in a high school environment, but I learned as much as I could about the new schooling system, extracurriculars, and opportunities.

- Now in my senior year, I befriend people who were in the same shoes as I was after I moved to this country, but I will not let them have the same experience. Instead, I take the responsibility to familiarise them with their new surroundings and be their guiding friend in their new journey, just as I did in India but with a deeper level of understanding because of my own moving experience.

So overall, my essay has a theme of loyalty, new experiences, and responsibility. I would appreciate it if someone could guide me by letting me know 1) whether this is a good essay topic 2) if so, which CommonApp essay topic does it suit the most 3) What should I emphasise the most on 4) How I can improve/tweak the essay.

Thank you for your help!


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2 answers

2 years ago

I would submit this to the peer review section of the site. You can get some great in-depth analysis that cannot be done on a forum thread.

2 years ago

The topic may come across as cliché to admissions officers because it relates to several common essay topics: COVID-19, the high school experience, and empathy in general. I recommend focusing on one more specific moment from your experiences. For inspiration on a topic, check out this CollegeVine article. One of CollegeVine's expert reviewers will be able to give you more in-depth feedback. Hope this helps!

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